Eating pussy can be A LOT.
Even as a proud pussy owner, I’ll admit that going down on a woman was once a daunting task.
The female vagina is so beautiful, yet so, so complex.
But after lots of exploration and practice, I can now say that I’ve become pretty damn good at the art and science of oral sex on a woman.
Although there are plenty of techniques to try, the best way to become exceptional at pleasing your partner’s pussy is to ask for honest feedback, read your partner’s body and energy, and create an environment in which she can relax and receive.
So in this week’s episode, I’m going to walk you through 13 steps to creating an epic oral sex experience, including the art of sexual build-up and advanced techniques that will bring your partner to orgasm.
Enjoy!
To go along with this week’s episode, I’ve created a FREE 14-step digital guide for Going Down on a Goddess. You’ll learn the art of sexual build-up, the best techniques for giving oral pleasure, ways to extend the orgasm and even give multiple orgasms, and, of course, how to make your partner feel like a Goddess.
Get your Going Down on a Goddess Guide here
Transcript:
Oral Sex Tips That Will Make Her Scream
So eating pussy like a champion was definitely on my bucket list before I died. So when I dated women in my early to mid 20s, I loved the sensuality of making out with women, even making love to them. But when it came to going down on them, I was like, what the fuck? I don’t know what to do. And I basically shut down a little bit and felt insecure, slightly ashamed.
And then I had to have a little pep talk with myself and I was like, you know what Layla? If you want to do this, ask a lover to support you and give you really honest feedback so that you can honestly say I learned to eat pussy like a champion before I left this planet. And I can proudly say that that is the case. And I am so excited to share with you 13 oral sex tips that will make her scream.
So we all know that oral sex for most women is like the queen of sexual experiences, because it is so ecstatic, it’s so pleasurable, and it really delivers the kind of sensual, intimate waves of orgasmic elixir deliciousness, that is something that so many women crave in their sexual experience.
And I’ll be honest, it can be overwhelming because every woman is slightly different in what she likes. Every woman is slightly different in how she’s built biologically, and every situation and every day can be different. So there’s art and science to being good at going down on pussy. And in this video, I want to share with you my best tips, so you can take it on board to get better and better at this most exquisite skill that will support your female lovers to absolutely sexually thrive.
And if you’re a woman watching this video, because you’re curious about how to experience more pleasure from oral sex, it can be amazing to watch videos like this because it empowers you to claim what feels good to you.
Too often as women, we have this subtle belief that we should enjoy what we see on porn, or we should enjoy what our lovers want to do to us, especially a male lover and that’s total bullshit. It is completely okay to own what your body likes.
I’ve also included a free guide down below that you can get totally for free right away that gives you a step by step guide of how to give a woman the most incredible oral sex experience of her life, and has additional secret ninja tips that will take you even above and beyond. So if you’re interested in taking this a step further, go ahead and enter your email address down below and you can access that guide.
Step 1. So I say this every time, but honestly it makes such a difference. Set up a sexy space, lay down a fuzzy cozy blanket. In fact, go buy one if you don’t have one already that’s fit for a goddess. One of those faux fur situations from Pottery Barn or this thing is like organic silk from ABC Carpet and Home. Ah. And make it this thing that you lay out, that’s like this experience is for a queen.
Light candles, non-toxic ones so you don’t make the air horrible. And set up music so that it’s really like I thought about this ahead of time. This is an experience that I’m inviting you into, really makes a huge difference.
Step 2, connect to her goddess like energy. So this is one of the most important things for being great at oral sex is energy attunement. So spend time looking at her body, feeling into how she’s doing today. You can tell her what’s beautiful about her and really notice how her body is sacred. The way that you hold her in this experience, the way that you see her in this experience is one of the greatest gifts that you can offer to her.
As well, it’s going to make you connected to how she’s feeling, which is what makes it seem like you know exactly what she wants but it’s because you’re tuned into her body. So you can feel when she’s like, “Yes, yes. More, more.” You can feel when she’s a little bit like, “Ooh, I rode that way if I’m ready for something different.” You can feel when you’re like, oh, maybe it’s time to ask her, what would feel really amazing to her.
When you spend this time right at the beginning, connecting to her and attuning, you’re going to become a far better lover. You can also spend time as you sit between her legs worshiping her pussy. This is a sacred portal. It is so fucking beautiful and it is divine. You can look at it with a sense of reverence and awe.
This is the pussy that birthed you, that birthed the whole world. This is the pussy that has been the source of so much pleasure inside of our lives and your life. So starting with a sense of gratitude, reverence and respect is key for setting the tone for a magical journey.
Step 3, set the expectation that this is a journey, not a destination. That means that there’s no pressure for her to cum, there’s no pressure for her to climax at all. And also, this isn’t something where you’re like going down on her so then you can have sex, or it’s not something where you’re trying to go down on her so she’ll go down on you.
Really say, I am just here to give you the most delicious oral sex experience, and there’s no pressure to orgasm, to have sex, even feel anything at all. I just want to tune into your body and connect with you and let you feel whatever it is that you want to feel.
Step 4, start by touching different parts of her body. So you can give her a breast massage. I’ve covered that in other videos that you can check out. You can stroke along her stomach. You can even touch the sides of her face and hair, which can be so beautiful. You can stroke along her legs. And as you do this, just feel a deep sense of connection and presence to her body. So there’s nothing worse than getting touched by someone who’s just trying to get somewhere or isn’t fully present in their touch.
As you stroke, be so connected to everything that you’re doing. Make it a meditation, the contact of your skin on hers and her body and her energy will feel that and it’ll put her into a deeper and deeper state of relaxation.
Step 5, you’re going to kiss around her pussy but not directly on the vulva yet. So what that means is start to kiss her inner thighs. I have not yet met a woman who doesn’t like being kissed on her inner thighs. So I dare you to find the one who does. But really sensual, sexy kisses, all along the inner thighs, all up and over the pubic bone, even up her belly to her heart can be so sexy. You can trace kisses up the center of her body, kiss her lips and trace all the way back down. Such an amazing turn on.
Step 6, you’re going to dance your way into the pussy. So what that means is you want to spend a lot of time licking the inner and outer labia, really spending some time doing circles with your tongue over the clitoris, but without going directly in or going too hard. It’s like you’re warming up the whole area. You can kiss between her inner thigh and the outer lip of her labia, like kissing up and down, and you really want to go slow, giving her time to drop into her body and her deepest sensations.
Step 7, you’re going to start to circle around the clitoris. So what you want to do is find out what feels best to her. Some women love it if you just lick over the lips without the clitoris being uncovered or revealed in any special way. Some women love it if you gently press up on the skin of her pussy so that it’s almost like you’re opening up the clitoris a little bit more. Some women love a flat tongue. I’ve found that’s generally the preference, but it can really depend. Some people prefer pointy tongue and you can experiment.
I think it’s usually the safest bet to start out with a flat tongue and then experiment with a pointy tongue a little bit later and ask if she likes that. Some women like hard pressure, some people really like soft pressure. You can also ask. You can literally do a couple of licks and say, “How is the pressure?” You can say, “How does this feel to you?” And let her feel like she can guide you as well.
Some women like it directly on the clitoris, some women like it actually around the clitoris. So you can feel into that. What will work for you? Some women like licking up and down, or you can spend time licking down a lot, licking up a lot can be very, very, very exquisite.
Some women like a pulsation with the tongue. So actually pulsating the clitoris. But something to keep in mind is that a lot of women prefer sustained stimulation over a long period of time. So one of the things that you can, kind of a rookie mistake, is trying to do too many different things.
So it’s like you’ll stroke your tongue this way a little bit. And then you’re going to switch over here and then you’re going to try this darting thing. And that actually keeps her nervous system from settling into the pleasure. So it’s actually getting into a slow buildup of pleasure that feels the most exquisite and most women get that from a sustained stroke.
Step 8, add a massage. So as you’re licking, you can stroke her inner thighs, massage her inner thighs, you can cup her ass and massage her from behind. If she likes anal play, this can be a really exquisite thing to add to her level of turn on. You can stroke over her belly. I like actually stroking the heart and breasts can be really beautiful as well because it offers this whole body turned on experience that can really enhance the depth of the pleasure.
Step 9, really tune into her body, listen to her moans, pay attention to when she starts bucking her pelvis, and really whenever she is signaling that things feel good, keep going, stay the course. As she gets more and more turned on, you can increase the pressure and increase the speed, but really locate what’s feeling best to her today. And then continue to do that and continue to do that with consistency.
Step 10, follow her turn ons. So as she gets more and more turned on, her clit will get harder and even bigger. So you can spend more time dropping into the honeysuckle hood, sometimes lifting up the hood and actually working more directly on the clitoris, which can feel too intense for some women. So for them, you can even sometimes lick a little lower if the sensation is too intense, or you can stay right on top of the glans of the clitoris, that honeysuckle hood, turning her on more and more and more.
But the idea is to really follow her pleasure. And one of the biggest keys is to not be in your head, but to be connected to her body. Because when you are attuned to her pleasure, and her moaning, and what’s turning her on, your body will naturally respond.
So it’s like you are following the intuition of your own body from being connected to hers. So rather than going into your head and being like, am I doing this right? Trust that your body knows how to listen to her pleasure and that’s going to make you a better and better lover.
At this point, some women love sucking. So you can also suck lightly over the honeysuckle hood. You can suck lightly over the glans of her clitoris, whatever feels really delightful to her. And then you can go back again to the consistent movement that she loves the most.
So at this point, when you’ve been going for a while, after you’ve been consistent for a really long period of time, if there’s a wave of pleasure and then you can feel the pleasure sort of coming down after it’s peaked, what you want to do is try something a little different, like sucking or going back to kissing for a little while. And then you can come back to the stroke that you know is turning her on the most.
Step 11, you can start to use your fingers. So if she’s open to it and you are regular lovers, you can bring your finger to the entrance of her vagina and actually stroke and stimulate the entrance to her vagina. So most women actually really prefer it if you turn on the entrance to their vagina, where there’s so many sensitive nerve endings, rather than just sticking your finger inside.
So if you just stick your finger inside, what happens is it can shock her nervous system and actually shut her down. If you signal to her body that your finger is there at the entrance to her vagina and you spend time stroking, and playing, and teasing, it can actually be a really big turn on just to have a finger or two right at the entrance of the vagina. And super exquisitely sensitive for most women, that’s actually going to warm them up.
So if they feel receptive, you can actually start to slide your finger inside very slowly. And remember that those initial moments of turning on the entrance to her vagina and slowly sliding your finger in can be some of the most exquisite and ecstatic.
It’s all about the buildup instead of just getting your finger inside. If she’s a new lover, it makes a lot of sense to actually ask for her consent. So is it okay if I put my finger inside of you? This can be done so sexily. Sometimes we think of consent as not being sexy. It can be so sexy when you own it. I’m not like, oh, can I put my finger inside of you? Which is not sexy. You’re like, can I put my finger inside of you because I fucking respect your body, because I only want to do things that feel good to you, because I want your body to be a fuck yes to anything that I’m doing so that this whole experience can be a fuck yes? That’s sexy. So when you do consent from a sexy place, it’s actually a really big turn on.
So once your finger is inside, one of the best places to stroke is the G spot. So you can stroke up and down. You can make circles. Again, finding what feels really exquisite to her. And again, most women actually prefer slow and steady penetration. Definitely not hard and fast. So really experimenting, really exploring. So many women are like, oh my God, that was the best experience in my life just because you went slow, just because you built up the pressure over time, rather than going in too hard and too fast. Then what you want to do is synchronize the movement of your finger with your tongue. So you can slightly be penetrating with your finger and stroking her G spot while also stroking and licking her with your tongue. So if you’re curious about more G spot stroking techniques, you can check out some of my other videos on that, which are linked down below.
Step 12 is keep it slow and steady as she approaches climax. So one mistake we often make with women’s bodies is if we go too hard and too fast, if she has a climax, what happens is her nervous system burns out and she can’t have another climax. If she closes her legs, pushes you off, says, “Okay, okay, okay,” she’s too sensitive. That means that you probably went too hard and too fast into the buildup. If you stay slow and even encourage her to breathe, what happens is the slow uptake means that the pleasure starts to cycle through her nervous system, and she can become open to multi orgasmic experiences. That comes from inviting her to breathe, staying slow and steady. And then the orgasm comes on more like an oceanic wave that can go wave after wave rather than a volcano that explodes and is all over.
Step 13, you want to allow her to integrate the experience. So again, you can ask her if she’s a new lover, what would feel amazing to her? Or if you already know her, giving her what she loves. If it’s me, compliments, what was beautiful about the experience, what you loved, what you found sexy? All of that.
Some women love being stroked and cuddled and kissed afterwards. Some women like space, they like to actually be left alone and just be in the beauty of what they just experienced. It’s totally up to your lover and for you to figure out what is going to make her feel the most held after such, and often vulnerable, and sometimes life changing sexual experience.
The biggest key to this is safety. So remember, especially if a woman has just had a very intense orgasm, it can open her into deep, deep feelings. She might cry. She might feel vulnerable. She might feel overwhelmed. She might just be laughing hysterically and celebrating the magic of the universe. And if that’s happening, you just really want to make sure to honor this as a sensitive time. Like if somebody gets really bad news, this is maybe a weird metaphor. And you’re like, this is a sensitive time. I’m going to be extra careful with this person.
Right after a massive orgasmic explosion, or even just a long oral sex experience that she’s maybe struggled with, it’s important to have that same mindset of like, oh, this is a sensitive time. Like, let me be extra careful with this person so that they can feel safe.
And over time, what that does is it conditions her nervous system to associate the experience with pleasure, but also you as being a safe partner, which means that she will slowly open up more and more every time sexually. And you’ll start to build this foundation of safety that will open her most orgasmic experiences over time.
So as I told you before, I’ve created a digital guide down below that also has more advanced oral sex techniques for you inside of it. If you want it, go ahead and click on that link and enter your email address. You’ll get it totally for free right away.
I would love to hear how your experience goes down in the comments. I’d also love to hear any other experiences from you down below. What you love in oral sex, or what are some of the techniques that make you a pussy eating champion that you have seen work so we get to share in all of the wisdom.
Please go ahead and subscribe to the YouTube channel to support pussy eating generally. And I will see you in the next video.