You know, over here I’m in the house of taking it REAL slow.
Slow pleasure. Slow touch. Slow love.
But I get it. Sometimes you want it hot and quick. You want that blue flame in the center of the bliss.
Sometimes their tongue is about to fall off and they are trying so hard.
Sometimes you only have five minutes before the baby starts screaming and the house turns into a dumpster fire.
You.want.it.faster.
I got you. I think it’s actually better if you don’t focus on the orgasm, but if I’m being super honest, sometimes even I’m like, “Gimme three orgasms to go and LET’S ROLL.”
Sometimes we want it slow and we’re just being in the moment and sometimes we want it NOW.
Explore my Wild Woman Guide for even more luscious orgasmic experiences!
Transcript:
5 techniques to orgasm quickly
Sometimes you just want to have an orgasm and you want it to happen faster. So here are five of my top orgasmic tips to be able to orgasm more quickly in a way that’s not just like pushing one out and then feeling like kind of empty and sad inside afterwards, but like feeling amazing.
So the first thing I recommend is to move your body. When you start worrying, is it going to happen? How is my partner feeling? And you unconsciously tense up. When you tense up, you restrict blood flow and also your body responds to sexual stimuli whether you actually feel turned on or not. So if you start swaying your hips and moaning, and I don’t mean faking it, but like inviting your body to flow and move in a sexual and sensual way, it can actually make it go faster.
Now I’m not saying fake your orgasm or fake the movement, but sometimes if you’ve gotten a little bit stuck, the energy’s flatlined, you’re not feeling it. If you rock your hips, if you touch your body, stroke your own breast, run your hands through your hair.
And this is one really big key, start inhaling and exhaling more quickly. You’re actually going to move your body into a quicker state of turn on and a quicker state of orgasm.
So the next one’s one that I used to use back in the day when me and Andrew would be planning some sort of like romantic evening or sexy night together. And I could just feel like I’d been working too hard. I was stressed out. My body wasn’t super into it. I would spend a period of time earlier in the day masturbating or using a Jade egg, but I wouldn’t climax. I just turned my body on.
Something that really works for me is to actually work with energy but actually fantasize with energy. So if you ever study Jia’s work, she has these erotic blueprints where you can get sexually turned on in different ways.
It’s a really brilliant way to understand your sexuality and classify yourself. And one of the classifications is energetic.
A lot of women are sexually wired to get turned on energetically. Not necessarily physically. Now this isn’t every woman, but if it’s you, then you using energy and using energetic fantasy can really help you to get sexually turned on and orgasm quicker.
So share with you how I use this with Andrew. If we’re having sex and like I’m not feeling it, or it’s just not quite as amazing as usual, I will actually visualize his penis having light and the light is penetrating me. I’ll actually visualize and feel the energy of his soul, like making love to my soul.
I get turned on by energy and I’m very energetically wired. So if I start to enhance the energy, it really helps me orgasm more quickly. So if this is intriguing to you, then definitely give it a try. And I find it can actually really kickstart your orgasm.
So one of the biggest things that might hold you back is letting them go for 45 minutes, but they’re not doing what turns you on. Maybe they’re going left to right, and you need up and down. Or maybe they’re going a little bit too soft and flowy and you need something more hard and direct.
So I know it can be hard to say what you want. I know, even for me, I can like be trying to say what I really mean and what I really want. And it still is a struggle sometimes. And when I say, “Hey, either, could you touch me this way? Could you try this?” Or even sometimes, “Could you whisper some compliments into my ear?”
So yes, sometimes saying what you want is like saying a little more to the left, a little more intense, but sometimes saying what you want is, can you look me in the eye and tell me three reasons why you love me? Or could you slow down a little bit and actually feel the energy of your hands?
I find it can be easier to express your desires outside of the sexual experience, because it feels less charged. It feels less that you’re going to kill the moment.
So another thing you can try is fantasizing. In my courses, we talk a lot about how to orgasm without fantasizing, how to orgasm looking into your partner’s eyes, how to orgasm just connected to your body.
And there’s something so amazing and so liberating about that. And there’s definitely moments where I’m not fully, fully feeling it. Let me think of something super sexy right now. Oh, I’m feeling it now.
Also, some women are very turned on by the mind. You like mental play. You like role play. You like getting mind fucked basically. And if you are wired like that, if that’s how you get turned on, then asking your partner to role play with you, or really like turning yourself on in your mind can be so powerful.
Some of us are at a place where we want to get away from fantasy, where we actually want to be much more present with our sensations and what’s happening in front of us. But you might be at a place where fantasy is actually what you need, that extra turn on, that extra juice, that extra bump to really get you to orgasm more quickly.
So I hope you can take this and when you want to gourmet orgasm, you can have a gourmet orgasm. When you want to scarf down a meal, you can scarf down a meal. I think it’s all about choice. And sometimes it just feels so satisfying to be like I just demolished that steak. So I want you to have the freedom to orgasm as quickly and as often as you want. Hopefully these tools get you there.
I’d love to hear from you in the comment section below what works for you. What do you use? Let’s learn from each other. And if you want more amazing tools and techniques, head on over to laylamartin.com, you can sign up with your email address. I send you awesome tools and techniques on a weekly basis to really have the most epic sex and legendary love. You can also check out my ebook down below. It has a lot of incredible guidance on how to have the most outstanding orgasmic experiences possible.
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